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Changing the way you see Turkey
F.F. of Northern Illinois - F.F. of Karsiaka Bay, May, 2009
Friendship Force members are curious about the culture of the countries they visit, even when on a commercial tour. Here's an event relayed by one of our members:
While waiting my turn to enter one of the churches in Cappadocia, Turkey, I noticed a woman picking through a trash container to select only plastic water bottles tops. She aroused my curiosity, so I attempted to ask her and her friends what she was looking for and why. They turned out to be Greek, and a lively game of charades ensued as they tried to convey their "mission" to my buddy Joyce and me. They mimed driving, and we guessed car. They refined their motions - we tried "wheels?" They smiled. They squatted, as if to sit. We posited "chair?" They smiled again. We scratched our heads. Wheel? Chair? Ah! Yes! The woman was collecting bottle caps to buy a wheelchair for a local hospital. She only needed a million. When I contributed my bottle top, she not only accepted, she insisted on a group picture - great for Greek-American foreign relations.
After that I saw her several times as we wove in and out of the churches on site. I smiled; she smiled. She wrote her name on a slip of paper, so I have the satisfaction of having made a very small contribution to the wheelchair that Frosso Samulada will get for her hospital.
While we traveled through Turkey, children often approached to ask, "What's your name." Our Friendship Force members took time to talk with the children and sometimes have their picture taken with them.
While on our tour, we visited the Ataturk Mausoleum and Museum in Ankara. Many of our members noted the abiding reverence Turks have for the founder of their modern, secular society, who is buried here:
What struck me most about Turkish culture is the universal devotion of Turks to Mustafa Kamal, the man who came to be known as Ataturk or "Father of the Turks." This man is revered as the George Washington of the modern day Republic of Turkey. Following World War I and the breakup of the Ottoman Empire, he led the Turkish National Movement in a war of independence. Ataturk ruled Turkey from 1923 until his death in 1938.
One of the elements of our exchanges that members often comment on is the fellowship and 'person to person diplomacy' around the kitchen table over a meal or during meal preparations.
A member wrote:
Our club's recent trip to Turkey made clear once again that traveling with Friendship Force is a great way to return home with a satisfied soul. In Turkey for twenty-two days, our first twelve were spent on an excellent tour of the country's must see spots in Istanbul and the countryside. Our guide was personable, intelligent, full of facts and interesting stories about these historical monuments. Our journals were dotted with dates and information, but we were left to wonder about the people who built and populated these sites: what did the early Christians in the underground cities eat for breakfast, what games did their children play, what songs and stories entertained them at night.
But on Saturday, May 23, our journey changed: we met our Karsiyaka Bay home hosts. As they shared thoughts on world affairs and religion and their stories of families, jobs, education, and history, Turkey become more than the grand sites. And of course, it's the stories that break down barriers, expose our humanity, and cement friendship. Monuments impress, but stories move us, feed our souls, and remind us what we too often forget when someone looks, dresses, or eats differently from us: underneath the externals, we all want a safe, decent place to live and thrive. I don't think our hosts Arslan and Mubeccel will mind me sharing the closing lines of their recent email. "We love you as friends. From now on you have a home in Izmir. You think like us in all matters of human beings. [Italics mine.] Whenever you are bored, get on a plane and fly to the Aegean Coast. We are here." Without Friendship Force receiving such a note would be highly improbable.
Two ambassadors help with homework!br
Our host Dilek tutored students who attended the American School in Izmir. As Joyce and I were dressing for dinner one evening, Dilek tutored a student who had to develop a 5 part script for a radio program. Dilek asked us to help them develop the plot of this radio program. The more we talked, the more involved the plot became. We decided to make the student's alter ego in the story the heroine. In the end, the heroine rescues a senior citizen from danger, despite being rebuffed by the senior earlier on. The plot we all developed together was a pretty good one, I thought, showing the benefit of international cooperation on homework assignments!
Several reflected on the contrast between their expectations and the reality they experienced:
o I found more similarities than differences with the Turkish people I met - surprising for someone steeped in Southern US culture. They are friendly, generous and hospitable and proud of their heritage just like us Southern rebels.
o The trip was a surprise because my expectations were very different. I was happy with my discovery of this country and its people. I made lifelong friends there and hope you, too, will get to meet them some day soon.
o I spent as much time as possible talking to people in the parks and other public places. Many spoke enough English to be able to have a conversation. With others a smile and saying "Chicago" was enough. Many times they smiled and replied "Obama." It was the 'westernized' people who responded the most. I think that we have a long way to go before the traditional Turks and the West can come together. We have to find a way to come together with respect for each other before that will happen.
o From previous trips to Turkey, my only impressions were of beaches, sunshine, and hard selling everywhere. It was really enlightening to meet the locals and enjoy their homes.
o From previous trips to Turkey, my only impressions were of beaches, sunshine, and hard selling everywhere. It was really enlightening to meet the locals and enjoy their homes.
We experienced many aspects of Turkish Culture:
o Our culture and the Turkish culture have many more similarities than differences. The families have the same close bonds with each other that we have, the same family squabbles and problems, and the same feeling of friendships. They worry about government, economics, and what is going on in the world. The biggest difference that I noticed is that, even in very large crowds, people are polite to each other; even when we haggled for bargains, as is the custom in Turkey, it was done with respect for each other. There is a pleasantness of stranger to stranger without concern of anyone's background or religion, which was a wonderful thing to see in action.
o Being my first exchange, it was a bit of a Culture shock. I had never experienced people bartering or shopkeepers standing out in front of their shops beckoning you to come in, not to mention all of the tea drinking one had to do before you finally finished a transaction. One of the most memorable moments for me was the afternoon I spent with the daughter of my hosts. We exchanged ideas of the culture of women and how alike we are. It was a wonderful experience.
Other ambassadors had delightful experiences with hosts' families or friends:
o One of the most heartwarming things we did in Turkey was our visit with Ayse, the 82 year old mother of our home host, Nejat Gunaydin. Ayse lives in a lovely but very humble apartment in the ancient city of Sartis about 60 kilometers east of Ismir. She spoke no English but hugged and kissed us like long lost relatives, invited us into her sitting room, covered with lovely Turkish rugs, and offered us refreshments. She was so genuine and affectionate and truly happy to meet us that we felt an immediate friendship with her.
o Turkey is a delightful country of huge contrasts. The antiquities are 4000 years old and there are new modern cities all over. The absolute best part is the PEOPLE. They are friendly, kind and oh, so much fun. Our hosts treated us as their very own family. We discussed everything, laughed a lot and certainly danced a lot. Most of us made lifelong friends.
o As Joyce Schmitz has said, the hardest thing about FF is falling in love with your host family and then having to leave them-- maybe never to see them again, despite promises to the contrary. Dilek was the "hostess with the mostest." I think she may be Turkey's answer to Jackie Kennedy. I treasure each of my conversations with her about her life in Turkey.
o Having Muhammet Coruh (host of Sharon Spear) ask to be put in touch with our son, a former high school physics teacher, so that they could exchange teaching experiences was a great highlight of our exchange, as was receiving a memento from a Turkish Rotary Polio Eradication fundraising campaign in recognition of Sally and my participation in two trips to India to immunize children against polio. These experiences embody one of the original mottoes of Friendship Force: a world of friends is a world of peace.
And finally there was this unexpected gift!
My balloon ride experience was a perfect example of the true meaning of Friendship Force. I was standing in line to pay for the balloon ride in Cappadocia, Turkey. I turned around and there stood my FF friend from Japan who stayed with me last summer for a week in Liberty Lake, Washington!
"We are working for peace at home and peace in the world."
- Mustafa Kamal
Ataturk
Pictures from our Farewell Party
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